so, yeah, door knobs

When last we left off I had been locked in the bathroom and had the most relaxing shower I have had to date.

For the record, that door is still broken.  The door still hangs there, and opens and closes, but it does not latch in any way.  The frame is still all smashed because we have to completely redo the shit-hole that bathroom is (LOL get it, get it, that was totally a double-meaning-hilarious pun!) so we plan to just do it all at once.

I think when this happened in 2011 originally, we really thought that would be happening sooner than it has been ... or will be ...

Anyway, we replaced the handle in the other bathroom before it decided to break and lock anyone in.  We also replaced the knob on the hallway closet, because it gets a lot of use while everyone fearfully respects how thoroughly I have cleaned it.

But the knob on the itty bitty pantry in the kitchen?

Nope.

When I started to turn it and hear that alarming strange clicking noise I was alerted to the fact that this knob was apparently reaching its end too.  The sticky-outy-thing (I still don't know the name for that) stopped sticking out.  When it got stuck and hadn't popped out I very carefully left it open, planning to have Paul Bunyan remove the knob when he got home.

Then the impossible happened.

Meatball, who left his dirty closed hamper in the middle of his room for nearly a week without noticing it was in the wrong place because it was where I had left it and he just assumed there was a good reason rather than asking, realized the pantry was open and needed closed.

Can you guess what happened next?

Well I managed to beg, plead, swear, and pull the door open somehow.  The knob hung limply in my hand and I knew it wouldn't be so fortunate an outcome if it were to get closed again ... so I fixed it ...

Well, sorta.

Anyway, apart from locking me in the bathroom -- which really was a benevolent occurrence in hindsight what with the shower in isolation -- I walk into knobs all the time and have knob shaped bruises on my hip and arms about 90% of the time.  But to have locked us out of the pantry?  The place we keep coffee?

My gawd, the depths the knobs will sink to!

It has since been replaced, along with ALL bedroom door knobs so that we won't have to worry about this again.  I hope.